The relationship that has been built between my daughter and myself is one I could never have dreamed possible.
I used to work every day, or night, or afternoon. I used to work on birthdays, and holidays, and weekends. The last 11 years have been such a struggle working hours that are an absolute nightmare. Today, we laugh constantly, we get into spats, we sing lyrics to songs we don't even know, we never say goodbye without a kiss, and we always say I love you. She is the night to my day and the breath in my lungs. My world turns for her and her alone.
Tomorrow my baby is off to Middle School and a whole new life is waiting for us. A life of bullies, cliques of catty bitches, puberty, obsessions with boys, dirty jokes, teasing to no avail. A life I could have sworn I just left behind. I am scared for her because I remember how hard junior high was. I remember how relentless the bullies were and I remember how there were nights I cried myself to sleep. My little girl is a peach. She is soft and sweet and bruises easily, but deep down she has that toughened core. A wall, per say. These next seven years are going to bring us a plethora of emotions and a roller coaster of memories; I need to hold on as tight as I possibly can.
|Bird & Me|
My sweet little ten year old.... well for 15 more days anyway. Eleven years is sneaking up on us and my heart is weighing heavy at the thought of how grown up she has become. 5'2", long and lean. My little bird who used to snuggle in the crook of my arm is now just a memory; She is now just a gangly tween who rolls her eyes and gets offended all too easily. My little bird. I miss her already. :(
I can hear her voice coming down the hall just now,
"Momma, come watch a show before bed."
She will still want me to tuck her in, rub her back for a few minutes, and kiss her goodnight.
She still needs me - for now.
If only she understood how much I need her.